Father's Day

Last night at church, we were blessed with by the music of Bob Carlisle who sung his famous song, "Butterfly Kisses". The song was released in 1997 and until last night the words never really had an impact on me. There was not a dry eye in the place.

Last night brought me face to face with the consequence of my choices and how those consequences extend far beyond just me. Because I chose to move head of God, I married quickly, later divorced, and am now raising two children alone. But the consequence is because my children may never have the opportunity to know what it's like to have a father in the home who loves them. A man who is a true worshipper of God and loves God with his entire being. A man who would take my daughter to a father daughter dance. A man who will teach my son how to mow the lawn or play baseball. Consequences extend so far beyond just ourselves.


I am committed to never dwell in the land of regret as it applies to marrying Lewis. That union of nearly five (5) years brought forth NyCee and Tyler. They are on this earth because they each have a destiny and a purpose from God. I am honored that God gave me the privilege of being their mom. Today, NyCee said, "Mom, I am glad your my mom. I love you." I nearly broke into tears.

Many people sent me text messages which read, "Happy Father's Day because you do it all for your kids." While I know that should be a compliment, my heart truly aches for my children. I now understand why women stay in loveless marriages and jump into new relationships. It's hard being the sole care giver, financial supporter, nurturer, disciplinarian, etc. But it's even harder because I will not jump into another relationship for the sake of having someone in my bed. That's just stupid.

Any man who does not love God with his entire being and has fruit of that lifestyle, has no place in my world. Time out for compromise. God so loved the world that He gave His Son. Jesus so love that He laid down His life. Those are the two standards that any man who dare approach me must meet. He must be willing to lay down his own dreams and desires for the sake of the family. If I learned nothing else during my marriage, selfishness has no place (on the part of either party) in the relationship.

I salute every strong man, regardless of race, creed or color, who does whatever it takes to support his family and children. I salute every father who tirelessly speaks words of affirmation into the life of his wife and children. I salute every man who actively practices the words of the Apostle Paul:

"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her..."
Ephesians 5:25

Love is not love until it is put into operation - it's an action. Jesus showed us His love by giving up His life that we may live. Men, show your wives you love them. Dads, show your children you love them. Love should not be a secret. Jesus was hung openly on a cross for all humanity to witness.