Dayna's Vagina Monologue

This morning, I had a doctor's appointment to check on the baby four weeks after the ultrasound. The baby's heartbeat is strong and stable.

But that is not what intrigued me about the visit. As I sat in the waiting room, holding my urine in a cup inside of a plastic bag on my lap, my mind began to wonder what in the world my cousin Max does at work all day long. He is on OB/GYN in Minnesota.

Women no longer had faces but were old vaginas, young vaginas, fat vaginas, skinny vaginas, clean vaginas, stinky vaginas, white vaginas, and my lonely black vagina. I was the only black person in the entire building. But that was not my original focal point. I began to wonder was everyone's vagina broken or sick in some way? Let's face it, that is the only time you go to the gynecologist. I know that somewhere in the world someone is having a baby everyday but not in this office I presume. What would make anyone want to fix vagina's all day?

I guess the same could be asked of the heart surgeon, eye doctor or brain surgeon. But honestly, I just don't know if I could stand to wake up in the morning knowing that I was going to have a day filled with vagina looking. Weird.

The other weird thing was that I was carrying my urine around in a container that I placed inside of a plastic bag. It was not an inconspicuous container so that no one would know what it was. Nope, that would have been too easy. It was a clear container filled with urine that sat on my lap in the waiting room.

So now, not only am I self-conscious about the urine on my lap and wondering if every vagina in the room is wondering why I am carrying it around-I am consciously aware that I am the only black person in the building. Not just in the waiting room. In the entire building. Then I begin to wonder why I was the only person with urine on her lap and why I was the only black person in the entire office? There are black people in Port Huron. Am I the only pregnant black woman in Port Huron? Or are there no sick or broken black vaginas in Port Huron? And, was I made to bring my own urine in a cup because I am the only black pregnant person in Port Huron? Strange.

After all of that, I was called to the back to see the doctor who is a white man but very nice. He was a bit late for my appointment as he had to go across the street to the hospital and deliver a baby. So I guess in between healing sick and repairing broken vaginas, OB/GYN's take a break to assist in the miracle of birth.

But after thinking about all of that, I realized that I really need to get out of the house and join the workforce again to keep my mind from wondering toward such ridiculous thoughts. I did ask why I had to carrying my urine around in a cup and was told that for pregnant women, the test conducted on the urine sample provides the best results from a sample taken first thing in the morning. Okay, that makes sense. Next, I just have to figure out how to tactfully ask about repairing vagina's all day and if I am the only pregnant black woman in Port Huron.